The excitement around a new year definitely lies in the promise it holds: the next 365 days can bring just about anything, especially if you’re a military spouse! In just a year, you can go through a deployment, a homecoming, a PCS and countless other curveballs thanks to your loved one’s service to the USA. All of that uncertainty and change can definitely make it tricky to keep resolutions, but it’s still important to try! I so firmly believe in not letting the military keep you from living your best life that I’ve come up with five resolutions perfect for military spouses.
Working on setting your own goals for the year? Check out my post on how to set better goals so you’re as successful as possible!
You’ll see these resolutions fly directly in the face of expert (and my own) advice to set goals or resolutions that are specific and measurable. They’re generic for a reason: while we share the common thread of our spouse’s profession, our lives are so unique that these resolutions may speak to you in a different way than the spouse sitting next to you.
Find the one that speaks to you and adapt it to fit your needs. There as some examples included for each resolution, but there are so many options that I hope you take ownership of them for your best year yet.
Five Military Spouse Resolutions for 2020
Take better care of myself.
Military life can often leave us feeling like we’re constantly running on empty, can’t it? Heck, even life in general can do that! If we constantly allow ourselves to get to the point where our proverbial gas light is blinking, how can we handle all that life throws at us?
That’s why taking care of yourself as a military spouse is so important. PCSs, TDYs, deployments, children’s needs, work and home responsibilities won’t ever stop and you deserve to have something left over at the end of the day for yourself and YOUR needs.
Make self-care a priority in the new year, whether it’s through exercise, a new hobby or making new friends. If you’re interested in learning more about self-care for military spouses, I highly recommend Noralee’s Self-Care for MILSOs guide.
Embrace life’s changes.
If there’s one constant with military life, it’s that just when you think you have it figured out, everything will change overnight. This can be so extremely frustrating, especially when longterm plans have to be altered or even canceled entirely as a result.
It’s almost certain that the year ahead will bring you some unexpected change courtesy of the military so the only thing that’s really up to you is how you react. As hard as it may be, embrace the change that’s coming at you to the best of your ability. Not jazzed about having to PCS again? Consider putting together a bucket list of all the things to do in and around your new hometown so you begin to look forward to the move.
Always remember that change can be really good! It may not seem that way immediately, but a year down the road, you may have a hard time imagining your life any other way.
Be the most positive person I know.
This one goes hand-in-hand with the resolution about embracing change, but it’s more applicable to everyday life, even when things seem fairly stable.
For example, we all know that deployment can be truly miserable. Missing your loved one, worrying about their safety, having to handle all of the daily challenges solo…it all stinks and it’s ok to be honest about that. But there’s a difference between being honest about the struggle and a constant Negative Nancy. Even if the day doesn’t go well, there is something good that came out of every day. Going into each day with a positive attitude can help you find more of those good moments. You’ll be happier, those around you will be happier and life may seem just a tad bit easier.
Welcome new people into my world.
Military life is often characterized by frequent moves and regular having to say “see you later”. The constant change of friends can be exhausting and painful and it may be tempting to avoid making new friends so you don’t have to go through the heartache each PCS season. But your resolution for 2020 should be to NOT do that!
Go for coffee, meet up for drinks, agree to join book club…in short, put yourself out there and welcome new people into your world, even if they’re there for just a short time.
Love like deployment starts tomorrow.
You’ve probably seen the “live like he deploys tomorrow” meme floating around military spouse social media accounts. I’d like to present a slightly different version as the last resolution for 2020: love like deployment starts tomorrow.
Life right before deployment begins is frenzied, packed with anxiety and generally something you actually kind of want to end. You don’t actually want to live like deployment is just a day away. But I’d argue that you DO want to love that way. “I love you” comes a bit more often, arguments don’t last as long, hugs are a little tighter and kisses are a little sweeter. Spend the next year trying to love those around you as hard as you can.
Will the year ahead bring a deployment into your life? Then you’re going to want to grab my big list of care package ideas. I’m giving away 165+ ideas (plus what to put in them) here.